What we take for granted...

Several months ago a gate guard told me that the mom of our gate guard, Evans, was very sick but that he was having trouble coming up with the money to get upcountry to see her. He said he had helped Evans as much as he could, so Robb and I decided to give Evans some money so he could visit her. Last month Evans handed us a letter that he had had someone write for him (he did not get to go to school so he speaks very broken English and does not know how to read or write English.) His brother had died and he again needed money to go upcountry for the funeral. Of course we gave him money again. Not only has he been wonderful with Micah and all the other kids but these were the only two times he has asked us for money. We have been bombarded by some people with various "needs", so there is always the question of when to give and when not to give. As a book is aptly named, "When Helping Hurts", always giving when asked is not always helpful.

I recently learned that Evans is married but his wife lives upcountry. I do not know if he has kids. When in Nairobi, Evans lives in Kibera slum. He often works 6 days a week, 12 or 13 hour days, and goes home to visit his family every three or four months! It is quite common for people to leave their families and move to Nairobi with the hopes of getting a job. They then send almost all the money they earn to their family upcountry. It is most sad for me to hear of single moms who must leave their children for lengths of time in order to make money to live on, as one of our neighbor's house help lady shared with me.

Lastly, and most sad, is our friend Margaret (or Mama Samaki [fish] as she often calls herself) who sells us tilapia fillets. She also leaves her family upcountry to sell fish here in Nairobi, and also lives in Kibera slum. Anyway, she had a baby boy last August or September and named him Dick after an American pastor/missionary who was here for several years. I believe Dick was her 6th biological child, giving them seven children. (Margaret and her husband took in a young homeless boy about 10 years ago and made him part of their family.) Margaret was concerned when she found out she was pregnant first of all because she had been "closed up" after her last child, but also because she is in her mid-40's.

Dick's delivery was fine for the most part. Margaret however was "paining" internally for months after the delivery as she had had a "student doctor" who did not perform something correctly (probably also the problem with her supposed hysterectomy.)

Margaret brought Dick to Nairobi last November, which is when I got to meet him. He was a very alert, happy, smiley baby. She had also brought two of her daughters and one son to help her with the baby and selling fish.

Margaret called me last week to tell me that Dick was gone, he had died. Since she was calling me from upcountry I could not hear her well so I do not know exactly what happened to him. Margaret is a very strong believer and we have had some wonderful conversations about the Lord and His Word! Margaret was trying so hard to be strong, saying that "the Lord knows", "He is still good", etc. When I finally asked her how she is doing she said she is not strong and to please pray for her to be strong.

These few incidents caused me to reflect on the things we take for granted. First of all, we typically do not have to leave our family in order to earn money to survive. Secondly, we can usually find money somewhere to go visit a sick family member or attend a funeral. Also, we rarely give a second thought to the quality of medical care we receive. Training to become a doctor here requires far fewer years than training to become a doctor in the US. Lastly, when we or a family member gets sick, we typically have insurance and/or the money to see a doctor, and we have access to specialists, like a pediatrician. Here, if you do not have insurance or money to go to a non-profit or private hospital you must go to an overcrowded clinic or a state-run hospital where you do not have a choice as to which doctor you see, licensed or not.

What I have often seen in people like Margaret is a strong, unwavering faith in God. It seems that the harder life is (from my perspective!), and the fewer conveniences and benefits and opportunities one has the more room there is for the Lord. Not only to trust Him to provide regardless of what that looks like, but also to rely on Him more, to know Him more, to truly live in Him, and especially to experience His love in a way far different from how we might in America. What a lesson, and conviction, this has been for me!